To my sweet, brave boy:
Mommy misses you so much. I look at your pictures throughout the day and still can't believe that you aren't with us. It still isn't real to me. I wonder if it will ever be? How are things up in heaven? I bet you are having a wonderful time, running around and playing with your friends. I pray that you hear me when I talk to you. There are so many feelings that I have right now. Mommy can't even figure them out...maybe you can ask God to help me? I so wish that things were different, Luke. I wish that all four of our babies were with us. I wish that April 18th, 2008 hadn't ever happened.
I wanted to let you know that there are things that I would have done differently if I had known that it was your last day with us:
* I would have demanded an echo at your appointment that morning.
* I would have taken you out in the town, letting anyone and everyone meet a true angel on earth.
* I would have held you the whole day. I wouldn't have put you down.
* I would have taken in your sweet smell.
* I would have stroked your hair.
* I would have made sure that Emily and Matthew held you, snuggled you, and let you know how much they loved you.
* I would have looked deeply into your beautiful blue eyes and told you how proud I was of you, how you had done more in your short life than I will ever do, how thankful I was to be your Mommy.
* I would have told you how much I would miss you. That I would think of you every minute of every day. That I would cry at the thought of you not being with us.
* I would have told you not to be scared and that Mommy and Daddy knew that your life in heaven would be much better than your life with us.
Luke, the loss of our "bringer of light" has been incredibly difficult. You are missed so incredibly much. I just pray that you know how much your family and friends love you and miss you. How much you mean in our lives. How much of a difference your life has made in this world. You are amazing and I look forward to the day I can hold you in my arms again. Thank you for letting me be your Mommy...I am a pretty lucky gal!
Love you my baby,
Mommy
Our Sweet Angel
Family with Luke
Our last picture!
Our Newest Project
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5 comments:
Thinking of you.
Love you, Luke! We miss you terribly! Please watch over your Mommy and Daddy today.
My heart hurts for your family today. You are in my thoughts. Your strength always amazes me. From the moment I meet you I thought what an amazing mother to carry on her child's life the way she does. He is living through you. The day you meet again will be truly magical. You are a blessing of a mother to all four of your children.
We love you, Luke!
Thank you for sharing your sweet angel with us...he is always near to our hearts!
Love you, too, friends~ Rebecca
Bernie, You all have been on my mind today. I can't even imagine the heartache you feel each day, especially today. I am thankful that God gave you the short time you had with Luke. That joy will forever be imprinted on your heart.
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