A note from Aunt Katie

Hi everyone! This is the time that I have been dreading all day. It was about right now two years ago that Luke went into distress at my parents' house. There was a flurry of activity and a lot of fear. I have a lot of memories from that evening, many that I would rather not have. But my memory of the peace that I felt that night is probably the strongest. God gave me the gift of peace that night--I needed that. I know that Luke is where he was always meant to be, no matter how much I wish he was with us.

I wanted to share a note that my sister Katie wrote about her memories of April 18, 2008. I read this today and it really touched me. It is a wonderful example of what Luke means to all of us. Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers, especially today. God bless you all!

I woke up at my parents' house in Houston. I was down for work, and I stayed there so that I would get some time with Baby Luke. He had been home from the hospital for a couple weeks, and it was great to see him at home.

The night before, I had fed him his bottle and snuggled with him. I got to do that. I got to hold him. Two of my sisters never did. That morning, I woke up, got ready for work, packed to go home, and slipped in to his room to see him before I left. He was sound asleep in his bassinet, so I just whispered goodbye, and I headed out.

I had an uneventful day at work, and caught my flight back to Minneapolis. Somewhere above Oklahoma, Luke became an angel. I didn't know until I got home. The phone rang (it was after 11 PM, so that was odd). I asked Tom who was calling, and he said it might be my mom. I asked why she was calling, and he said that it was because she was at the hospital. I asked why she was at the hospital, and he said the worst thing I have ever heard in my life: "Luke died."

I collapsed on the floor, crying, wailing, not knowing what to do. I knew Luke would be okay. But what about my sister? What about Tommy? What about my parents? What would they do? What would I do? What would Emily and Matthew do? Luke was gone. And we were left.

That moment is forever etched in my mind. Those words, the feel of the floor when I hit my knees, the sound of Emma asking her father why I was crying, the call to the airline to get my tickets for the next morning...It's always going to be there. And I don't want it. I don't want to have this. I don't want to wake up every day knowing that my sister and her husband ache for their Baby Boy. I don't want to know that my parents are forever changed.

What I do want is for people to understand how pervasive Congenital Heart Defects are. They are the absolute number one birth defect in the world, affecting 1 out of every 100 children. Some are mild, but some are, like Luke's Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome, major malformations that require countless surgeries and hospital stays, and often end in death.

I want people to know that Luke Thomas Haberman may have only lived for 5 weeks, but he did more and fought harder than anyone else I know.

And most of all, I want Luke to know that if I could have traded places, I would have. I love you Baby Luke. I miss you.